G       Em G
So banish me to the furnace,   I must own though
D          G             Em   G                   D
My actions are in no way born out of some sort of Darwinist offensive
G                Em            G                      D
I just get a bit fidgety times; thumbs twiddle in the middle of a funfair
G             Em                G             D                   G               
High jinks to break up the so-so, methinks we need a little ho ho ho.

                                          D
Go - Earls Court; a bag of rivets for the goon at the entrance
G                Em                   G              D
Straightways the floor gets slippery, eyes glaze and Bobby's getting jittery
G               Em                   G                     D
Don't tease him, it don't please him, what's that you want me to appease him?
G          Em            G              D7
How so sir? with Tetris? Not possible - didn't bring the GameBoy.

G            Em           Am    D7
Took problem chimp to the ideal Home Show
G         Em           Am    D7       G
Once in a while I need these childish kicks
             Em           Am    D7
Took problem chimp to the Ideal Home Show
G             Em       Am      D7       G          G Em G D, G Em G D
God speed the trial to cite my childish kicks.

G           Em     G           D
Wade in the water, wade in the water children
G           Em     G           D
Wade in the water, wade in the water children
G           Em     G           D
Wade in the water, wade in the water children
G           Em     G
Wade in the water, wade in the 

D             G        Em G                D
Brickbats for Sottsass,   bouquets for the chuckling footstool
G               Em      G             D
In the heart of darkness there are no hassle free cabinets
G            Em             G        D
Sometimes occasional tables, mid-air look kind of dangerous
G             Em           G            D
Llewelyn-Bowen, two Carols, go on bobby - both barrels.

G                    Em                G                   D
Three cheers for the infinite leaflets, ticker tape got me thinking of Kempes
G             Em             G                         D
Funky fabric, hip hip hooray, there's no stopping him, rip rip away
G           Em           G            D
Heaven yes, distant now, one imagines after this lot
G          Em            G              D
Still gasp at his agility albeit in the tree of tranquillity

G                       Em                  G                      D
Yes it's a mess I don't deny the crime, but look I've reduced your ironing time
G                      Em                    G                           D
Multifunctional, ain't that what you call it? Well here's a thought feel free to install it
G             Em              G                         D
Your sink may well be superior but we all stink once we reach the interior
G             Em                 G                           D7
Next week I'm taking him up west: we've not seen Lord of the Dance.


G            Em           Am    D7
Took problem chimp to the ideal Home Show
G         Em           Am    D7       G
Once in a while I need these childish kicks
             Em           Am    D7
Took problem chimp to the Ideal Home Show
G             Em       Am      D7       G          G Em G D, G Em G D (x4)
God speed the trial to cite my childish kicks.


G           Em     G           D
Wade in the water, wade in the water children
G           Em     G           D
Wade in the water, wade in the water children
G           Em     G           D
Wade in the water, wade in the water children
G           Em     G           D
Wade in the water, wade in the water children
G           Em     G           D
Wade in the water, wade in the water children
G           Em     G           D             
Wade in the water, wade in the water children